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June 1, 2013 / another1ofthose

I smell Lavender


Lavender wedding

Being part of the LGBT society in Lebanon, as we all know is something really hard. Closeted people like myself face huge constraints when it comes to their love life and their future. On the other hand, people who are openly gay, might face discrimination in their daily lives. It’s a very big decision to choose to come out openly as gay. You might be disowned by your family, bullied and discriminated but at least you won’t have to live a lie, and vice versa for closeted people.

I’m in my mid 20’s at the moment, and I am already thinking of what my future could look like. Coming out to my parents is not an option, as I already saw what happened when a distant cousin of mine came out as a transsexual and the words I heard coming from my own parent’s mouths. And I keep hearing everyday how “these people” (ME) are mentally ill and all that bullshit.

I already considered immigrating to a gay friendly country, where I can live openly as a gay guy without any fear of resentment, and I already made this option a goal for the recent years to come. Even though I’m still gonna be lying to my parents and telling lies on how I still haven’t found my perfect match yet, but I guess that is a chance I am willing to take.

But what if this option didn’t work out? Everybody has got to have a backup plan, and mine smells like lavender.

Lavender marriage is a type of a male-female marriage of convenience between 2 homosexual people who are mainly closeted. and that’s where I’m gonna head if my first option didn’t work out as I planned. Marrying a Lesbian is the last thing on my mind, but all I know is that I’m NOT gonna marry a straight woman and add a person to the life of lies I’m living.





Leave a Comment
  1. aguywithoutboxers / Jun 1 2013 1:24 AM

    I understand and regret your situation. I imagine it is very difficult. I think having a plan and a back-up is an excellent idea. Best wishes, much love and naked hugs, my gay brother. 🙂

    • another1ofthose / Jun 4 2013 12:18 AM

      thank you my friend 🙂

      • aguywithoutboxers / Jun 4 2013 4:23 AM

        Much love! 🙂

  2. "The awesome artistic handsome Aussie" :) / Jun 1 2013 9:54 PM
  3. witchylisa / Jun 1 2013 10:25 PM

    You gotta do what you gotta do dude.

  4. Just me / Jun 8 2013 11:18 PM

    As gays we can all relate to what you wrote, it is definitely a thing that we all must go through and the decision is fucking hard … It is a life changing choice that we have to make at a certain time …

  5. mimitrans / Jun 9 2013 2:23 AM

    wish u a good luck, i think all what need in lebanon is more luck that’s all, we all deserve a better life im not talking abt lgbt, each and every sect of our society needs luck .. :)) just smile it will get better

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